


don't you know, we were meant to see this through

by amaanogawa



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Amnesia, Angst, Established Relationship, Healing, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Major Character Injury, Memory Loss, Weddings
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-20
Updated: 2018-03-20
Packaged: 2019-04-04 23:41:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,849
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14031417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amaanogawa/pseuds/amaanogawa
Summary: "Kuroo often thinks about how the smallest decisions can lead to life changing events, be it cosmic energies or the product of a simple coincidence."Daichi loses his way. Kuroo realizes that he would follow Daichi regardless because after all, not all those who wander are lost.





	don't you know, we were meant to see this through

Kuroo doesn't know if he believes in fate, but he does believe it was something cosmic that led him to Sawamura Daichi that one dreary evening in the middle of the pouring July rain. 

They had quite literally ran into each other, chest smacking into chest, and Daichi had tipped backwards and Kuroo had reached out to grab him purely out of instinct. That was how they found themselves tangled together, soaking wet in the middle of a desolate street in the city of Tokyo. 

"...Sawamura?" Kuroo had murmured, blinking rain out of his eyes, his fingertips feeling fidgety on the small of Daichi's back. 

"...oh my god,  _Kuroo_? I didn't even recognize you, your  _hair_ -"

And that was it, that was all it took for Sawamura Daichi, former captain of their rival team to come back into his life. Kuroo doesn't want to talk about the next three long years that they spent skirting around each other, both so hopelessly oblivious that it made everyone around them sick, when all of Kuroo's brain power was spent on reliving the accidental brush of Daichi's fingers against his and the dimple in Daichi's left cheek that appears only when he laughs in just the right way. It was three years of that before Daichi had banged on his door in the middle of the night, grabbed Kuroo by the shirt and kissed him like the fate of the world depended on it- and maybe it did, in a way, because if Daichi hadn't kissed him all those years ago Kuroo thinks the world as he knows it now wouldn't even exist. 

It exists in the form of Daichi, hair mussed from sleep, soft around the edges wearing only Kuroo's threadbare Nekoma t-shirt. In the way he stirs his coffee as he reviews his papers before an important meeting. In the mole tucked away like a secret in the crease of his eyelid.  

(It's only visible if he closes his eyes for you, and that only happens when he's sleeping or leaning in for a kiss.)

In the most straightforward way possible, all that this jargon serves to communicate is that Kuroo is hopelessly, irrevocably, overwhelmingly in love with Sawamura Daichi, and the only reason that it is so is because they had coincidentally bumped into each other two years after they first met in high school. It means that if Kuroo had lingered just a couple of minutes longer at the grocery store, or if he had taken another route home than the one he took, or maybe if he had been stopped at a crosswalk, his life would be wildly different than it is today.

The thought is too scary for Kuroo to think about most days, so it's all he can do to chalk it up to some sort of cosmic energy and file it away in the back of his head. But sometimes it still manages to worm its way out despite all of Kuroo's effort to keep it contained, especially when Daichi falls asleep against his chest and he's running his fingers absentmindedly up and down the curve of Daichi's spine wondering where he'd be without all of this. 

So it was easy, really, one of the easiest decisions that Kuroo has ever made in his 27 years, to stop by the jewellery store on his way home from work and purchase a golden wedding ring with the date that they met again engraved on the inside. What can he say? Kuroo is nothing if not a romantic. That doesn't mean that proposing wasn't nerve wracking. Kuroo was so nervous he had spilt his drink all over Daichi's lap at the restaurant, and then he had tripped and wiped out on the pavement on their way back to the car, and then for the piéce de rèsistance, he went and dropped the ring box when he pulled it out of his pocket as they were stargazing at a scenic lookout just outside of the city. Daichi had laughed, and then he had cried, and then he dove into Kuroo's arms holding on a bit too tight as he choked out _yes you idiot, yes_.

The year following that wasn't as stressful as most newly engaged couples claim it to be because to be quite honest, Kuroo and Daichi had very little to do with the wedding planning. Suga and Yachi looked like they were having a field day with it, and Kuroo can't say it was the wedding he was looking forward to. It was the marriage, the waking up to Daichi every day for the rest of his life that he couldn't wait for. He was sure Daichi felt the same, especially when Sugawara would call Daichi with a whirlwind of a meltdown over  _lilies or peonies for the tabletops_?  _Velvet trim or silk_? And Daichi would sigh, give Kuroo a tired look before repeating for the nth time that day that  _it doesn't matter, Suga. No, I mean, of course it matters but- yes of course I appreciate your efforts, lilies sound great and silk would be just fine._

Kuroo often thinks about how the smallest decisions can lead to life changing events, be it cosmic energies or the product of a simple coincidence, like when he left the grocery store at just the right time for him to reunite with Daichi all those years ago. Or on this particular day just three months shy of their wedding, the choice to take 5 minutes longer than they usually do in leaving their apartment because Kuroo just had to pull Daichi in for one, or two, or maybe three extra kisses that morning. To decide that he can drop Daichi off at work because he has to pick something up at the post office before going to work himself. 

To glance over at Daichi in the passenger seat as they drive through an intersection. To see Daichi quietly singing along to the song on the radio, cheeks pink, tie just a little crooked, fingers intertwined with Kuroo's own. 

To hear the sound of a blaring horn, watch as a car comes barreling towards them over Daichi's shoulder. To pull Daichi in close just on instinct alone, a yell barely leaving his lips, throwing an arm over Daichi's head in a desperate act of protection. 

To feel the sickening impact, the crushing of glass, the ear shattering screaming of metal twisting against metal.

To open bleary eyes a minute or ten or maybe even years later, disoriented and trying to wipe something warm and sticky out of his vision so that he could see. Calling Daichi's name with a failing voice. 

Somehow every decision had led to them to this, lying broken amidst a smoking wreckage before everything goes dark. 

 

\---

 

"Kuroo. Please, you have to rest."

"How can I- not when Daichi's- god, Sugawara.  _Daichi_ -"

The incessant beeping sounds filling the halls of the hospital is driving Kuroo crazy. He feels  _crazy_ , like all of this is a hallucination or maybe a fever dream. Just this morning they were fine. They were happy and engaged and fine and now- 

"How could this have happened?" Kuroo croaks, rubbing his face with bandaged hands. "I don't understand, Sugawara. How-"

"You're still in shock. You need to stay put and rest. I'll stay with him, Kuroo. Listen to me.  _He's going to wake up_."

It's hard to allow himself to be comforted by those words when Sugawara is sheet pale, when his eyes are red rimmed from crying and his voice shakes as he speaks. He'd been at Kuroo's bedside when Kuroo had woken up less than an hour ago, groaning from the immense pain in his head creating starbursts behind his eyelids. 

"Kuroo!" Sugawara had cried, before wrapping his arms around Kuroo's shoulders and squeezing the breath right out from Kuroo's lungs. The next few minutes were a blur as Sugawara tried to get Kuroo up to speed on the situation, and even though Kuroo could very clearly see Sugawara's lips moving right there in front of him, the sound of his voice wasn't processing in Kuroo's mind. Everything was slowing down around him, the world not feeling real, none of it feeling real. It's not real. 

_Accident._

_Concussion._

_Minor injuries._

_Daichi._

He blinked. That was a word he recognized. 

_Surgery._

_Heart stopped._

_No oxygen._

_Brain damage._

Those weren't. 

"I'm sorry, what?" Kuroo had croaked, feeling his lip split and tasting copper in his mouth. 

Tears roll one by one onto Sugawara's cheeks as he draws his brows together anxiously. He takes Kuroo's hands in his own, holds them tight, as if trying his best to keep some part of Kuroo together. As if to give him something real to hold on to before his entire world burns down around him and he is left there in the ashes, in the middle of nothing but cinders and what he has lost.

"They don't know if he's going to wake up, Kuroo."

 

\---

 

It takes another day before the doctors sign his discharge papers and allow him to go home. Not that he does, because  _home_  is lying in a hospital bed three floors above his own in the Intensive Care Unit. A nurse wheels him into the elevator, then down the hallway and into Daichi's room, and as she draws apart the curtains a broken sob manages to escape his lips before Kuroo covers his mouth with his fingers, effectively muffling the agony that's screaming to get out.  

Daichi is lying so still on the bed that Kuroo wouldn't be able to tell he was breathing if it weren't for the monitor screen lit up next to him, beeping rhythmically to Daichi's heart. He's hooked up to what seems like a hundred different machines all clicking and whirring, working hard to keep Daichi alive through the tube in his mouth. His face is mottled with angry red-purple bruises and bandages, his head wrapped in a stark white gauze. 

"Oh, babe." Kuroo whispers, eyes watery. He slides his hand into Daichi's, and after five years together it should feel familiar to him but at the moment it just doesn't. Nothing feels familiar and nothing makes sense. 

"Wake up Daichi. Wake up, _please_. I'm begging you." He murmurs desperately, pressing his lips to Daichi's ice cold fingers. Daichi lays silent in front of him and when he thinks about how mere hours ago he had been happily singing along to the radio Kuroo truly can't tell if Daichi is the one who needs to wake up or if it's him.

Later that day Sugawara brings Kuroo clothes and toiletries and food, the last of which goes untouched for the first day of his discharge and half of the second.  When Sugawara arrives with more food after he gets off work and discovers the previous meal still full in it's unopened container, he grabs Kuroo by the back of his collar and shakes him with a frightening glare, tears prickling at the edge of his eyes. 

"Listen to me. You can eat by yourself or I can knock you over and force it down your throat, because I'll be damned if I'm going to let you do this to yourself when  _he's_  still fighting like hell to come back to us."

This is the Sugawara that Daichi has loved since they first met in high school nearly a decade ago now, the reason why Daichi chuckles or sometimes sighs in exasperation before inevitably giving in anyways, with a shake of his head and a vague explanation of  _it's Suga; you'll understand his might some day_. And Kuroo does now. He's always known that Sugawara is a beast beneath his layers of beauty, has feared his whip sharp grin that somehow serves as both a reassurance and a warning, often at the same time. But this is different. It's him waiting all alone as his best friend is taken in for an emergency surgery after a horrible accident, and then coming out the other side strong enough to take care of his best friend's fiancé as well. It's a hurricane of a man who won't take no for an answer, not from him and certainly not from Daichi, and for that Kuroo is grateful. 

"He's going to wake up, right?" Kuroo whispers, unsure if he is asking himself or Sugawara, whose eyes soften as he moves his hand from Kuroo's collar to his back. 

"He will. And when he does he sure as hell won't be happy to see that you've gotten even bonier than you already were before, you damn string bean. Eat."

 

\---

 

Kenma arrives on the third day even though he's struggling through his Master's degree in a university nearly a 3 hour train ride from Tokyo. He can only stay for a single night, but he hugs Kuroo with trembling arms and doesn't say much else. He can get Kuroo to eat when even Sugawara's nagging can't, knows what will get Kuroo's appetite going during the direst of situations. He curls up on the recliner next to Daichi's bed and doesn't fuss or offer empty reassurances that he knows Kuroo doesn't want to hear.

"Thanks, Kenma." Kuroo says later that day, in the middle of their comfortable silence. 

Kenma's eyes dart over from the screen of his 3DS, eyebrows tilting up a fraction of a degree. "Stupid Kuro." He says, and then nothing at all.

Kuroo gets it. He and Kenma have never needed to say what they mean for the other to hear it, and oftentimes it's more comforting to know what someone wants to communicate before they even utter the words out loud. 

_Stupid Kuro, get it together._

_Stupid Kuro, be strong._

_Stupid Kuro, take care of yourself._

"Yea." Kuroo says quietly, sighing and laying his cheek against the back of Daich's hand in his own, trying to gather the strength to continue for as long as Daichi needs him to. 

 

\---

 

By the sixth day, the doctors have come in and taken the tube out of Daichi's throat after confirming that he is breathing on his own, which is a good sign. But they still cannot be certain if he will wake up or even if he does, what kind of deficits he may present with. 

Nearly everyone in their social circle has come and gone at least once, offering their heartfelt condolences as if Daichi was already dead and Kuroo is losing his mind. They mean well, but the fridge in the family room can't possibly hold anymore casseroles and Lev's sister keeps bringing multiple a day and Kuroo doesn't even like casseroles. Daichi used to eat them when she brought them to their meet-ups, but now Daichi can't eat them and the other patients' family members are starting to grumble about the sheer number of casseroles occupying the community fridge. 

"It's a disaster," Kuroo tells Daichi, as he runs an anxious hand through his hair. "She brought a dessert casserole, babe. I googled it because I refused to believe it was actually a thing but apparently it  _is_ a thing. This world is a terrifying place."

He fills in what Daichi would say if he were awake, probably something along the lines of  _well at least she can make actual meals and not just nachos. Besides, casseroles are really convenient._

"Don't lie to yourself. You love my nachos."

_I do, but they're not a meal and you eat them as one way too often. How are you still so damn pointy everywhere with all the junk you eat?_

"Hey now, let's not get all feisty Sawamura-kun. Don't be hurtful."

_...head..._

"Head?" Kuroo blinks, confused. It takes him a moment to realize that it hadn't been his imaginary Daichi that had spoken, because suddenly the hand in his is curling over his fingertips and Kuroo looks down in alarm, eyes wide.

"...head hurts," Daichi groans through cracked lips, his voice hoarse.

"Oh my god. Daichi. Somebody, get a nurse, please!"

"Ow. Please don't yell. My head hurts."

"Sorry! Sorry." Kuroo wipes at his watery eyes with the back of his hand, heart pounding. Daichi is awake. He's awake and he's talking and he isn't displaying any obvious signs of brain damage and the world is finally starting to make sense again. "Daichi. It's Tetsu. I'm here, baby."

Daichi's eyes finally flutter open, and he squints around the room before eventually resting his line of sight on Kuroo. 

"Tetsu...?" He slurs, sounding dazed. 

"Yes. I'm here. I'm here."

It's then that Daichi opens his eyes all the way and looks at Kuroo properly for the first time in what feels like an eternity. Kuroo is so relieved to just see those eyes again that he almost misses the way Daichi is looking at him; not happily, not lovingly, but confused. 

There's not a spark of recognition in his eyes as Daichi stares at him, and Kuroo can feel his heart dropping into the pit of his stomach. He knows what's coming before Daichi even speaks. 

"...who are you?"

**Author's Note:**

> title from [Citizen of the World - In The Moment](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WEgY1x3YhrQ)
> 
> [my tumblr](https://amaanogawa.tumblr.com) / [ko-fi](http://ko-fi.com/A31851F8)


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